Blank Thinking
I've save a draft of my graduation entry. I decided not to post now.
Anyway, these few days...i have doubts with my SS and history. I've been doing about 3 subjects everyday. It's part of my plan. But I forgot to include my maths. I've been reading SS n History, doing EL summary and sciences(chem n physics). My physics...I feel more confident than my chemistry. It has always been that way, even for prelim. But i ended up getting A2 for chemistry and B4 for physics. And Amaths, I've been doing it almost everyday from July to September. It's still not perfect.
I dunno what am I feeling now. I'm more like gay nowadays...being so concern and helping helping. I dont think i have any reason for doing so. Sometimes I just want to sleep. I just want my chemistry practical to end. I need time for SS. 2 weeks later is SS. I need to revise my Emaths and EL. I need to revise my Amaths and History. It's kinda fun..but a lil threatening. EL...I really need to make it. I need to get A for physics and Chem and maths. I really think so. I want A for comb human too. EL...i want a 3. Ms Tan told me once...I could stand a chance to get a 3. I hope she really mean it. I'm not planning to go JC, i'm just trying to show that it is never too much to handle.
Me and my proving shits. I should stop it. But I'm just too competitive. hais... and then, I realised something. I must always aim to complete more task than what i arrange for myself. I do more that way. :D
Hais...how I wish I am someone else who is sooooo normal like others.
It's not worth it
Yo sup blog!?
Wahh...today is really unproductive.
I did more physics than maths. I did a lil Amaths...and lil physics...and sleep and dream. haha. I was slacking. I did the physics june paper. Looks easy but i got 32/40(including the out of syllabus). Damn it. Then I did Cresent girls. Wow...i thought it's gonna be hard...i guess paper 2 should be hard la. I did paper 1, it was FUN...really my type of game. It requires thinking only.
I did some Amaths..those weak ones. I did some corrections for paper 2.
That's all. I stay the for 8 hours for only that. HAHAHA...the rest, i sleep or dream. Oh ya...i did some planning for tomorrow. Hari Raya..i plan to tidy my books...and stuffs. Then I need to prepare for NCC uniform and then study again.
Wonder if it is worth it...
Today,
I went to school to see Ms Tan for my comprehension summary. It was bad although I just passed. At first, I called Mdm Fong regarding my testimonial, she said she found it. Oh well, i guess what i asked from Emily last night was for myself to read.
It's okay. Then I went to CC to study. I read and tried to understand my Chemistry 'mindmaps'. It was quite fun. I don't usually take the time to read and understand. Usually, I would just skim through them.
Next, I read social studies book 3, on Merger and Separation. It was really boring...i fall asleep several times. Partly, it is because lack of sleep la. DUHs! Almost everyone has it. Then I read Collins GCSE physics keypoints and write down some notes. Well, it's not really meant for me...but for someone I care. Yet I think I'm gonna photocopy more than a set...to give away to anyone who might need it. I added in something that I'm learnt and did some research on the topic. I hope it's useful. I take down only of those stuffs that I think that someone might be weak at.
Then I read the stupid history, chapter 2. I understand the chapter better now. After that I continue writing the notes.
Actually, before posting this...I was at my void deck, doing EL summary and writing the notes(adding infos). 15 mins to 2am. Hope I can sleep till 8am. I want at least 6 hours of sleep.
Haiss....
my monitor screen is fucking pissing me. It keeps on-ing n off-ing itself. Stupid screen...
I hv a lot to study...but i am afraid i hv to back down my religious one.. I have improved a lot i guess. Amaths improve...Chem improve, physics not really...ahhh wadever. I am still feeling not good enough. need to get A for all. I got 17/25 for the first time for EL summary. I tried some exercise on my own..and look at the answer...it works...this method is much more safer...i know what i did to get 17. :D that's the most important thing. However, yesterday...I tried another exercise, the method is not working well....it's abt summarising someone's personal recount...what that someone is thinking n events that happen...it require more than just picking up the points. It requires thinking n deeper understand of the question and inference. Damn....stupid screen...difficult for me to type...sorry if i hv typo errors. I m sooo bothered wif other things...like not handing in my testimonial to mdm fong. I went to sch yesterday to find her...but couldnt. At first, i call her...no answer...then I go CC again...came back at 4++ to check...saw mrs Ong and scared her...well not purposely...and then ask Mdm Fong's whereabouts...she said she just went home 15MINUTES ago. =_____='' AHHHH!!!! Fuk!! I cant concentrate studying liao...i feel uneasy....what if she dun wanna accept anymore testimonials? Then i'm probably hv no good points. I thought she said whatever ur friends wrote was not good cos' they're all adjectives which u can pick out from the dictionary...so i was like it's useless, then i dun bother to put keep it properly. And i lost it....the last person to read was my aunty...i dunno where she put it....if i ask her she would hv said she has forgooten where. =___='' so forget it.. Oh well....i hope Monday, she will still accept it. and i hope i m not the only ones..paiseh le.
Sheeesh...i've not been studying effectively...damn it. need to get to work...
Laugh
Damn. I had a bad day...at first...was the going to sch. Late...nevermind that, what's worse is that i forgot my EZlink. OKok...then that's over. Go sch..damn vexed. And Mr Zafran was there to worsen it. Ask me why...i say i slept at 3. Cos' many work...he said he dun care. Like duhz, who cares what i do anyway? Then was told to get the late comer form. Argh...another nonsense. I must read a stupid script just to get the form. =___=''
OK...wrote my name and see that Mr. Heck-care again to sign the slip. Saw Ms Tan and gave her the work she requested. And then back in class...out of nowhere, a stupid piece of paper was on my table...i asked kamal abt it. Another nonsense. Maths was all good. Then recess was another nonsense...look for ms lee, she's dunno where. In the end, saw her liao. Then after recess, another nonsense...Mrs Goh went thru the chemistry paper 2....so fast that i became lost..and went to sleep. Then the monster...gave us the test which i didnt hv time to study for. Nonsenses.That Heck-care keep reminding me abt the so call deal. I would rather skip sch than to follow that stupid deal. By then I thought the nonsenses has ended. However in the evening when I wanna go home, the stupid 282 bus was so lousy that i hv to wait for 30minutes...
Oh well...i think what i need is a good sleep.
Day in KFC
hi blog..
A while ago, I experience a change of mood. Then when I recall my anime drawing again, I feel better. I feel as tho my drawing is alive. :)
Anyway, today I planned to go CC to study. When I got there, the aircon is still not fixed yet. Oh well..I leaned on the window panel near the lift and saw a schoolmate.
He was planning to go to CC too. But after knowing abt the aircon, he changed his mind. So we head down to KFC to study. He is a SEC 3 student. We dont really know abt each other...but seen each other in sch but never actually talk. Today, we just did. Kinda cool to know smth abt job.
I've thought it's possible to study in KFC. And yea...it's not possible if u r there to read. I try reading the model answers that Gill gave and history txtbook. Oh...unproductive. I can only do work. And help that SEC 3 guy in physics.
I am a kid
Well. Last night I watch animax. It was nice. I can feel as though I was myself 7 years ago. I love the feeling of being in a fantasy world of anime. How I wish reality is like that. Full of adventures, nice-sweet-caring people,etc. Somehow the feeling brings back memories of younger me. For half an hour or so, I could just stay blindly into space and imagine a lot of stuff. I was all alone, so I treated the time badly. No one disturb me, the house is so quiet with one 'gundu' staring into space while he is in his imaginary world.
Ok, enough of nonsense. As I expected, my physics result is not as good as my chemistry despite having done some assessment. Physics got a 4, Chemistry is 2. Thus, it is not all because of how much you work for it, it is how smart you work for it. My combined humanities, is not very surprising. F9. Amaths, C5. Emaths, A1. EL, D7...all fail liao.
Majority of the class absent themselves on Friday. 21/41 came. That was cool. The class became so quiet except for the aunties who talked about going JC. Sometimes I wonder why do they want to choose JC when they even complain that being in secondary school is so stressful. Beats me...even me, who hardly hv stress, don't want to go JC. Guess they're looking for more challenges?
Anyway, with these results....I think I wont have time with MUIS examination(another national examination in religious class). My result is so below satisfaction.
Teachers are giving more revision worksheets...it's really difficult to do my own revision. I need to complete about 10 topics of chemistry, then re-read physics n Chem txtbook to strengthen basic foundation, read SS n History to understand fully and make my emaths n amaths solid. So many things. Now is 7 October. I must try to finish my chemistry by 10. Argh...cant make decision now.
I was amused then challenged
I was feeling quite alright. I am really very sure that I can actually do my Amaths paper 1 very well and pass paper 2. Paper 1 was actually do-able. Paper 2...there's a lot i dunno. :) I hv identified the topics in paper 2 that have pull me down. I have yet to identify my chemistry weaknesses...one of which is stiochiometry.
Today, I got to know my overall result for chemistry. I got a WEAK A2...VERY weak indeed; 70. I think if I'm not wrong, i got an A2 for mid year too. MYE for chemistry was really easy. I want an A1. I am the lowest distinction ass in the class for chemistry. And I actually believe that there's a lot of intelligent ass in my class. Sad to admit, but I am a bit prejudice towards intelligent buggers in the class. They can score distinction even with last minute preparations. :D
I've found a chemistry book...twenty-three years series? LOL..1979 - 2002. I found it quite long ago..last year or earlier this year. AND I just started it on Monday. I never do any chemistry assessment for prelim preparation. All I did is READ my mindmap almost everyday in July and then during the prelim practical..and finally prelim itself. I didn't use my mindmap to its fullest advantage. I didnt memorise it, just plain reading. BUT for physics, I did a lot of assessment. I completed the whole book of multiple choice except topic 1 and I hv a feeling i did not do as well as my chemistry.
Results
We have received almost all our papers. It was really nothing to be happy about. Some people are irritating me with his 'all As' or at least almost all, with his behaviour of 'I befriend only with smart ppl'.
Anyway, that's their problem.
Now, it seems that I am still not clear on how to answer source based questions. I failed both History and SS. I thought I know history content more than SS...but it seems like I scored SS more than history. It's a lenient marking. I can tell. Yet I still fail. Sometimes I wonder what went wrong for history...it's my source based! My physics is also deteriorating. For paper 1, i got 27/40. That's bad enough.
My EL...weak...49. =___=''
However, there is also some good news(at least to the sub teacher). For my chemistry, mdm fong wrote "a very good improvement". But she still say...practical is badly done. SO i'm likely to fail? I dunno. Then Emaths...i am kind of not happy even though MR Tay say I improve a lot....A1 but a WEAK A1. He also commented on my Amaths..he also say I hv improved a lot. Yet i only get C5. =___='' ARGH! OK...my mistakes for paper 1 are all careless mistakes and some really cant do. I believe I can actually scored REALLY well for it if I had the time to check everything or DO it carefully. Paper two...like I said, no confident. This is a mental problems that I have to overcome. Finally, my EL teacher actually wrote on my paper that my sentence construction has improved.
I just want to be a hero of myself.
Then the class, I think they did pretty well for comb humanities. I am trying to relax on bucking up my SS/His. I cant afford to kill myself no more. Yep...i m quite angry...haha..not demoralised. I dunno whether this is a good/right attitude but it's just me...hate to lose.
My weakest is my Comb Human and EL.
